My apologies for the late post: I was traveling back to North Carolina most of the day and then I got involved in the whole “DO ALL THE THINGS” aspect of arriving home after a trip.  So let’s get to it!

This post is not about Charlie Brown, sorry guys (I can only do so many cartoon pumpkin stories a week, really, and what do you mean you didn’t read my amazing post on Raggedy Ann and Andy: The Pumpkin That Couldn’t Smile?!  You totally need to read it because it has EMOTIONS and you will cry and it is awesome, I think I will watch it again, maybe tonight, and also tomorrow).  Today’s post is actually inspired by a NYTimes article that happened earlier this week.  The article is about pumpkin growers, mostly amateur folks that are not professional farmers, and their quest to grow the one-ton pumpkin.

Now, I know that people do this sort of thing for state fairs but  I did not know this was a thing.  I saw an enormous, awesome pumpkin at the North Carolina State Fair last year:

Look at those crazy enormous pumpkins!  I do not remember the exact weight of the biggest. blue-ribbon winning pumpkin but I believe it was under 1,000 pounds.  Some of these farmers are growing pumpkins that are 1,800+ pounds, which I just cannot even imagine.  Our Whole Foods has a few super-large pumpkins in their Halloween pumpkin display, but I’d be surprised if they were more than 500 pounds.  I am tempted to buy one and haul it home, although I doubt it is carveable.  According to the article some of these super-almost-one-ton-pumpkins have walls that are a whole feet thick, what?!  And people can sell the seeds of these pumpkins for hundreds, sometimes even thousands of dollars.  Seriously, give the article a read, it is fascinating.  Here’s a clip:

“But it is the seeds, a strong indicator of a pumpkin’s size, that are the most bankable factor in the quest for giants. Last fall, Chris Stevens, 33, a Wisconsin general contractor who grew the 1,810-pound pumpkin, sold a single seed from it for $1,600, by far the most anyone has ever paid for a pumpkin seed. Its descendants may prove just as valuable. ”

Big-pumpkin enthusiasts can visit BigPumpkins.com, a website devoted to the growing of competitively large pumpkins.

In a related internet search, I discovered that many towns hold Big Pumpkin Regattas in October.  Basically people hollow out these giant pumpkins and use them as row boats, which is incredible.  Here are some photos:

And here is a pretty ridiculous video:

These contests happen in Vermont (you missed it, it was today), Oregon (this one’s the 22nd so you can totally go!), Nova Scotia (that also happened today, sorry I’m late on this, guys) and presumably Google will provide even more information if you are looking for a regatta near you.

What would you do with a giant pumpkin were you lucky enough to have one?  And no “I’D MAKE A GIANT PIE,” because most of these guys aren’t edible.  I mean they are edible but their thick walls and giant innards are not tasty.  So what would you do with your giant pumpkin?  I’d be really tempted to carve mine, because it’d be amazing, but I imagine you’d need crazy power tools to accomplish it.  I’d love to hear your great pumpkin ideas!